hi Jhallie
guess u must have realized ( and i guess i mentioned too ) that the letter i
wrote i purposely tried to avoid the biggest happening in my life currently. U.
I dont know where to begin and seriously have no idea where this mail is going
just felt the urge to write and who better to share this with than you!!!
The fact that i am waiting for some kinda response from you after a few messages
and missed calls has further deepened the urge to try and get thru to u in some
form or the other.
Am listening to the BEE GEE's song - I dont wanna be alone. its kinda late and
calm almost serene.
Kinda hard to believe that it been only 40 odd days since we started seriously
talking. So much has happened that the speed of our relation doesnt cease to
amaze me time and again.
And yet so little has happened. I havent even had one good look at you. Though
in my heart of hearts i know u wont be any different from what i imagine you to
be when i close my eyes when we meet. Yet the proximity of you is something i
want to experience. The sense of security and belonging that comes from it. Of
being what i am and knowing you will accept me for what i am not for what the
situation demands i be!!
Strange but some parts of a mother, a child & a friend is what i feel when i
think about you. from your caring and protectiveness to your absolute
vulnerability and comlpete understanding and patience in helping me understand
myself.
There i just took another look at the cell to see if there were any messages!!
wonder why. Wonder why i cant get enuf of you. Why after having spoken to you
for hours i still feel as if we had only just begun and the feeling of having
left out so many avenues to explore, not knowing if there will be another time
when i will be able to explore all of them. some will get missed out when we
talk later and that really gets to me.
Our jumping from one topic to another, and trying to get back on track (in
vain), our tiffs our making ups which necver get started from my end. and our oh
so endless leg pulling, sometimes so much so that both of us are hoping that it
stops but not saying out aloud.
Our knack of stealing the words from each others mouth, of saying without using
words, of saying something and meaning something completely different and the
joy on finding out that the other has already understood. gone thru the riff
raff and struck home.
The tenacity with which you go into issues which i have been avoiding from
myself because deep down i realize the answer to them but just not wanting to
take the effort to take them up. The patience with which u help me in slowly
unravelling my past...
The way we laugh at small jokes and incidents and react to incidences in the
same way. The uncanny naughty ideas which crop up in our heads and the ability
to see the humour in the entire situation even while the whole world may be
falling around us.
The similarities of having so many friends yet so few of them really knowing
what goes on in our minds, and in-spite of our short friendship (in no way small
or insignificant) we can reach into each other and know something is amiss.
I sometimes think what would it have been if BV had not called me that valentine
night and asked me to make that one phone call. fate and destiny - no wonder i
believe in them. And i can say with pride i am truly richer now than i was a few
months ago. and u r my wealth. and the more i use it - the richer i become.
Thank you LADY LUCK.
And the best thing is i see us becoming closer as the days and years go bye. i
truly cherish you and wont ever take you for granted. And i promise i will be
there forever and ever. (ok maybe thats not a nice thing to do to someone u
really like....:-))
Sigh i guess i was rambling. but i feel much better now ( u r flying kiss just
came)
Miss u sweet heart
Ur duffer!!
